I was up all night, waiting impatiently for the morning to arrive. When the sun rose over the Humber River, I called a taxi and made my way to the airport. After three hours of waiting and fourteen hours in an airplane seat, I finally reached home. The heat of my homeland didn’t bother me. I smiled as it engulfed me; it was like a warm hug from a mother. I ran up to my parents outside the airport and drove four hours to my home in Panjab.
I got out of the car and my dogs came running towards me, I greeted my grandmother and went inside my home. I had lived in Canada for seven months, but the relief I felt returning to my place in Panjab, was a million times greater than that of returning to my place in Canada. I went to my room; it was still the same. My unread books glared at me from the bookshelf, as if they were angry at me for breaking my promise to read them. My first guitar stood in the corner, my bed was looking comfortable as ever, I let out a sigh and joy flooded through my body. I was home.
My mother cooked dinner and the entire family dined together. Her food still tasted the best. We shared stories; they were eager to know about my time in Canada. At night, I slept like a log. I wasn’t very tired; I was just at peace.
When I visited my friends, we spent hours and hours talking about our college experiences, new people we had met, and new places we had explored. We grabbed some pizza and went to an ice cream place; I felt like I was thirteen again. This was the longest that we had all gone without meeting. The morning had turned to evening in what seemed to be the blink of an eye.
I drove by my old school and nostalgia took over me. I wanted to go inside, laugh with my friends in the classrooms, and play basketball, but that chapter of my life was now over.
I visited many historical gurdwaras all over Panjab, remembering my ancestors, who gave their lives so that we could prosper, and practice our faith. Visiting Sri Harmandir Sahib (also called the Golden Temple) was a therapeutic experience. I felt immense peace in my soul, and I remembered our Gurus, our saints, our martyrs; whose blood irrigates the plant of our faith.
When I visited my friends, we spent hours and hours talking about our college experiences, new people we had met, and new places we had explored. We grabbed some pizza and went to an ice cream place; I felt like I was thirteen again. This was the longest that we had all gone without meeting. The morning had turned to evening in what seemed to be the blink of an eye.
I drove by my old school and nostalgia took over me. I wanted to go inside, laugh with my friends in the classrooms, and play basketball, but that chapter of my life was now over.
I visited many historical gurdwaras all over Panjab, remembering my ancestors, who gave their lives so that we could prosper, and practice our faith. Visiting Sri Harmandir Sahib (also called the Golden Temple) was a therapeutic experience. I felt immense peace in my soul, and I remembered our Gurus, our saints, our martyrs; whose blood irrigates the plant of our faith.
I also got the chance to visit Kashmir, which had been locked down since 2019, first by the Indian government, and then by the COVID-19 pandemic. The valleys, the old forts and palaces, the natural scenery, and the warmth of the locals showed us why Kashmir is called “Paradise on Earth.”.
When I was in Panjab, I was at peace. I felt a sense of calmness that I hadn’t felt since I came to Canada in October 2021. I felt like a child again, eating the food my mother cooked for me with love, gardening with my father, laying down with my head in my grandmother’s lap, listening to her tell me stories of my ancestors, and playing basketball with my friends.
Deep down, I knew all along that I never wanted to leave Panjab. My soul is attached to this land, its people, its language, its struggles. Even living across the world, my heart was still in the fertile soil of this land of warrior-saints. I hope that we can come together and rebuild Panjab, and reinstate it to its former glory, of spirituality, peace, love, warrior-spirit, and justice. But this is life, you take it as it comes; you play the hand you are dealt.
I felt warm. I felt safe. Home is indeed an emotion.
By Suhel Singh Randhawa