By Hai Tran
Advocates of ADR will often emphasize the advantages of mediations but what we hear less often is the importance of learning sound conflict resolution skills. Although mediation services can be useful for conflicts that are at an impasse, if more people are better equipped with the skills to deescalate or resolve conflicts on their own, then mediation might not even be needed in the first place. Mediation can only help individuals resolve the specific issue at hand but if these individuals are able to learn proper conflict resolution skills, these skills can be transferable and be able to help resolve any type of conflicts that could arise.
At the Osgoode Mediation clinic, the staff and students not only provide mediation services, but also conflict resolution training. At these workshops, the attendees receive training that will help them better identify the causes of conflict and learn how to properly respond to that conflict. Identifying the conflict may sound trivial but it is often much more complicated than what most people might think. Generally, conflicts are convoluted, and the causes of conflict are often not surface level or one dimensional. For example, a mediation between a divorced couple may at first seem to revolve specifically on monetary considerations (such as splitting up assets), but someone who is better trained at identifying conflicts might quickly recognize that the problem is not actually about money at all. Two parties might not be able to come to an agreement on how an asset is divided but that doesn’t necessarily mean it is the specific asset that the parties really care about. With this type of dispute, it is often the relationship between the parties that is the problem and it isn’t until the relationship is repaired then would the parties be able to agree on anything. Therefore, by understanding why the problem exists and not just what the problem is, parties to a conflict can better spearhead the overall conflict.
Secondly, although there is no definitive, correct way to respond to a conflict, it is important for individuals to be aware of the different conflict management strategies and when to deploy what strategy. In conflict resolution academia, researchers have pointed out five different conflict management strategies and all these strategies have their pros and cons, depending on the situation. The five conflict management strategies are:
1. Avoidance: this conflict management strategy is often used when parties to the conflict would rather avoid the problem and maintain the status quo. Although we often hear that we should not avoid our problems, this might not always be true. In some circumstances, it might be better to avoid the conflict if you know that confronting the problem will only make the problem worse. Other times, it is best to avoid the problem if you know the problem will go away on its own time. However, avoiding a conflict is not ideal if you know that the problem will only get worse over time.
2. Competition: this conflict management strategy is often used in litigation where parties have a win-lose mentality. Although the competitive strategy tends to be more adversarial, this strategy can be deployed if both parties know they don’t want to maintain or repair their relationship. The competitive strategy is also often used when one is certain that they are right and that their needs cannot be compromised.
3. Compromise: this conflict management strategy is deployed when parties cooperate and concede in order to come to a compromise. Ideally, the gains and losses are shared mutually between the parties. This strategy sounds attractive, but it requires collaboration from both parties. Therefore, it is important that both parties to the conflict have a good relationship before trying to adopt this strategy.
4. Accommodation: this conflict management strategy is used when a party to the conflict will agree to meet some or all of the other party’s needs. Although this might sound like quitting or accepting to lose, accommodation can be a great strategy if you are trying to preserve the relationship rather than “winning”. Other times, accommodation is a strategy used for future gains. In this instance, a party can choose to accommodate with the expectation of receiving some benefits in the future.
5. Win–win: this conflict management strategy is employed when all parties to the conflict are able to collaborate and come up with a solution that satisfies all parties to the greatest extent. The parties to the conflict need to think outside the box and be open-minded to different negotiation variables. Although this conflict management strategy sounds ideal, realistically it might not always be possible. This conflict management strategy takes time, effort and a great deal of collaboration from all parties involved.
Because there is no one right way to respond to a conflict, it is imperative that individuals have a knowledge of all the different conflict management strategies and when what strategy is best to use. Ultimately, the parties to the conflict need to assess the situation and determine what strategy is best suited for them and the problem.
Overall, although the Osgoode Mediation Clinic focuses on mediation services, we also understand that conflict resolution training can be a great way to prevent a conflict from escalating to the point of needing mediation. This is why we also offer conflict resolution workshops, so please feel free to reach out if you have any questions regarding these services.